Will the real Best Buddy please Stand Up? On the Great Wall of China maybe.

They always say its a woman who stands between two men who are best friends. But viewing it from a different perspective, I am with the lady really. Maybe she just made the guys understand that their so-called Best-Buddy-hood was, after all, weak, too weak that her mere presence has broken in. So, in that way, she just helped the two guys in realizing the fact that true friendship is way beyond what they thought it to be. Lets get this story going already! 😛


Enter Protagonist. The chap had an awesome group of people around him called friends. Soon he gets a girl, and thats that. Here’s where the second girl enters. Now you all might be thinking, will she be threat to the relationship? Does he have an affair with this new chick, bla bla.. usual TV series stuff. But then this aint that. This happens to be my blogpost, so that never chances(trust me. it never will as well). 🙂

So second girl enters, quickly becomes one of the best buddies. (now thats skill!) All’s well. But it is here that something goes wrong. She gets ridiculed. The guy doesnt have a clue why. But apparently he does(you can almost sense the confusion there). Somehow, he finds a wall. Something like a Great Wall of China, with his “old” buddies on top.


Now here’s the thing.

He has a girl. She loves him, He loves her.

He has a best friend. She makes him happy, he makes her happy.

He can climb that wall, “can” NOT “will” or “should” or “has to”.

He wants to climb that wall. But he needs two people on board with him. The two girls.

Finally he makes it up with both of them. There he finds his buddies.

The Great Wall of China is long, and huge, and there is place for everyone.

He needs Everyone on the great wall.


Please try to find your point in this post.I would really appreciate if you posted what you have gathered in my comments section. Just want to know if this write up had a point. 😛


Ciao Buggers. Cheers. \m/


Time Again.


This time I froze. She was looking into my eyes; staring as if it were my waist lines. But they weren’t. I was too busy in thought to answer her query, for she had asked me what had happened. I knew the answer, but I couldn’t tell her. My language suddenly got a limited tag, my vocabulary shunted out like those cheap resistor boxes did in my school labs. But that’s that.

It was on a perfectly bright morning, some day at school, it was 1996 perhaps, that I first saw him.

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plain love.


There was this really innocent girl. But then, she was sweet, and gorgeous. To be really honest, she wasn’t a bitch. But then, maybe that was the reason why her guys always used her. Maybe, that’s the reason she had to learn everything the hard way. But then, the important fact is that, she learned to live. Everyone loved her, but they all took her for granted. And now, after all these years, she found herself a guy, someone, who she could relate to, on each n every point of her life. He loved her. She loved him. But she knew this wouldn’t happen. He knew that too. Even with all the pain he had been through, he had finally found that one person, how could he let her go? But she couldn’t risk giving him more of the suffering. She knew what he had been through. Maybe, she had been there too. At some point of time, she knowingly sacrificed her sense of losing him, over the fact that their inevitable separation, which will chance only years later, would end in more pain that they could take. But nothing is inevitable here. Everything can change. But she loves him. He loves her. And their families love them. The only fact that separates them is what the society had made, in an effort to glorify everything.

It may sound silly. But it’s a serious issue nevertheless. And the way it is now, all of these seem like impervious dykes they cannot pass. Of course, their love is strong enough to emotionally cut down such a barriers, which they have done long back, by falling in love in the first place. But as far as practicality is concerned, there are serious issues to be addressed. She is lost… he is lost. But they are two souls in love. It’s the future that’s uncertain, and it’s the society that’s the hurdle. They can’t be another Romeo-Juliet in all this, for they have grown out of that age-old romances long ago. But then, all this changes nothing. They are in love. They’ll always be in love. It’s the bond between them, that is too strong for any reason like this to break, but being a couple, to live their love with each other, seems so very far away. He cannot run from it like this forever, he knows. And she cannot stand the fact that it is what it is. They so badly want to be together. Each day they talk, they are drawn closer and closer to each other, and each second they don’t see or hear from each other, they tend to love each other more n more. This has landed them in a total complicated situation where they are in love; they want to be with each other, but at the end, after all this (they think) they know it will not happen. How ironic life turned out to be!



At times you think you know a lot of things. But then those are times… just times… at the end of it, you blandly realize the fact that You are more wrong than How wrong you expected yourself to be. Human relationships are like human beings. They are never certain, Hollow at times, and at times, totally reason-void. Now with my rep-sheet, you might be wondering if this is one of those posts, but no, This is a totally different one. I assure you that part at the least. But then to come to think of it from the surface itself, you can see crystal clear to where I’m going. Okay, lets cut the intro part on this one to only this much.

In my 19 years of life, I’ve met a lot of people. But then to come to think of it, only few remain as constants, both in the case of friendship and in the case of acquaintances. o which point I’ve realized that, there are some people who we meet, and when we come in contact with them, we somehow know where we are with them. It’s not like a normal relationship building thing, where the first impression, or the lasting impression decides everything. To those people, There is no need of the “impressing them” part. All they are interested is in your true self, and vice avers.

It’ll be so damn clear about where they stand in our lives. There’ll be no confusion, there’ll be no “That’s Complicated” terminology and there will be No answer for the question… “What is your relation with him/her?” Of-course, we come up with satisfactory answers for ourselves n unsatisfactory ones for the general people, who seem so hollow in their WYSIWYG attitude. But then at the end of the day, Impressing the crowd doesn’t matter, until unless you are some celebrity with a decent fan following.

Here is where I confess. I’m smart enough to know what people think of me, and even smarter enough to know how to ignore them. But then, the only thing that pains me is the fact that the people I ignore think I’m totally clueless about the shit they are throwing at me. Yeah, I know the whole idea of my ignorance is ironic, but then That lil fact, I just cant ignore.

Now to the practical part. To be honest, I’m just 19 and I don’t want to think about my future love-life. Of-course, I’m a lil concerned about my education n all, but then I don’t mix n drive… Its only when someone asks you in the face about the former, will you realize you are at a total baseless point. That time, I choose to ignore reality altogether and warp to my dreamworld. And that’s how I’m still together, in one piece.

From a point where there is no reason, why do we always have to drag ourselves to a place where you have to justify your past, present n future? And even worse, is it even worth it? Why can’t we just dream on, follow our own instincts, n get there when we get there. I’m siting an example: Why are we so worried about the prospective relative conflicts that may occur from some marriage that may happen some 6 years later(definitely not hoping for it), when we are totally in love with each other? Is it even a reason to move on, by stopping what is going on strong, and without any particular reason, just because there’ll be some shit happening if whatever happens the way we are postulated? “If” “What If”.. Are these words totally deciding where we are going? And the worst part is, due to all this shit, we try to make up reasons for which there are no reasons. “I don’t know. I love you so very much. But then at the end of it, We both know it wont work out. And at that point, we would have grown real close to each other like inseparable souls. And if we try to separate us then due to this reason, we may both be ending up in disaster n pain… So lets move on… But then I miss you.” Maybe its my shit attitude towards practicality and “If” at times, but can anyone explain to me why I should do whatever that’s supposed to be done, rather than do what I want? Can’t I ever do what my heart feels like? Why should I let my fcking brain override the shit outta it? Maybe we’ll hurt ourselves if at all it comes. But then Why can’t we love each other till it chances, if at all it comes to that point in the first place?

Ohkay… this is one way of seeing it. But it’s not always this relationship that’s in question. Various others too. Why should practicality ever ruin what is good now? And Why are we letting it ruin it and our happiness? When did all of us become so self-centered, to only think of ourselves in the future? Why can’t we make our dreams, both emotional and the rest as our goals, and try to achieve them, for which we have to be successful in the first place.

What I’m trying to say is… Why can’t we extend our dreams beyond the materialistic bit, ’cause suppose we reach all that we dream of like that and achieve all of that, wouldn’t there be something still missing? Why cant we prioritize those things, so that we’ll jump the hurdles n reach there, rather than making the second last hurdle the finish line? This was one message “Love Aaj Kal” gave, beyond the surface plot n message. And almost every soul missed it. Hope you got what I wanted to tell you from this panoply of rabidness.


Maybe it wont happen, maybe it can’t happen… Maybe you know that.

But then its still a “Maybe”…



I’ve been understanding the language of the world lately, and thus, I believe I have started to listen to my heart, and to believe in the omens the One has to give me.

And so, My heart tells me to ask for forgiveness. I know its too late. But then you know the saying…


S O R R Y !!

…for everything…, Just please forgive this soul. I have learnt it the hard way. But then I’m happy now that I’ve learned to understand, or better, to begin to understand the Language of the World.

…okay… now I feel better… I think…




This year is the year of change. Yep, and it’s already started, that too, with the greatest advocate of change, President Barack Obama. I hope the Americans’ll get something good for their country under him. And from all that media, with so many artists supporting him, it’s presumed that it will also strongly affect the media industry, of which the initial stage has already started. I respect that great man for whatever he is to bring to this world. Since, he doesn’t need any advice on anything, I’m pretty sure America will come up “culturally” after all.


Enough US talk already. Now lets talk about India, where there’s a state called Kerala, and a city called Trivandrum. Here’s where I stand, and my life revolves around this small fast growing city. Well, for the past 5 months, It has started to extend to a small town about 160 km north of Trivandrum, called Kottayam, but my mind, my loyalties, and everything I hold dear are still here.
sasthamangalam Hmm… so that’s about it. So what was special about this week…aah! yeah.
So, yet another Valentine’s day passes, my eighteenth one to be precise. And yeah, you guessed it right… I’m still Single. In my life, with things like Shell, Unix and its successors, Need for Speed, GTA, Counter Strike, There’s hardly any time I can devote any part of my mind to “impressing” the girl. To me, as I’ve learned, it’s the sure waste of precious time, with dangerous side-effects, the major ones being losing a good friend, and a final product…a girl with too much ego n attitude, that almost tops the Eiffel tower.

There are times in life when at a point, just due to a negligible span of time when an immature thought builds up, that’s when everything goes wrong. And so it has.
Having a good friend for two long years, and then suddenly just like that, she turns to see me as someone who used her, that’s punishment. It’s been almost a year since that punishment started, but to be optimistic, I really thought that would go. But then yesterday, on Valentine’s, My fears just got realized, yet again. If total ignorance wasn’t enough, the frequent stares killed me…almost.

hope n me, just seperated...
To be honest, I hope I could rewind time just to stop myself from doing what I’ve done. It’s not losing a girl, that pains. It’s losing a good honest friend. She was a Friend first, and something else only later… and I regret the ‘something else’ part, very much. Still I hope it all changes one fine day, still expecting one more call.

I’ve started to believe in the secret of  life. When you want something seriously and from your heart, the whole world conspires to help you achieve it. Hope I get my friend back.

Lessons To Life. Part #1

Well…you know how it is. You learn by mistakes, and sometimes you learn too much (or even less) that you also try to learn how it chanced and well… at times try to teach your neighbor some of those lessons. But then, there are lessons in Life that I cannot ignore after all that change it made in my life. So let’s approach those lessons both rationally and irrationally, like surds…And in my real small life segment, I’ve learnt lessons that are worth an encyclopedia. (Credits to the bright young, old and the dying who have interacted with me at some point of my life) So…lemme begin…

To begin with…hmm… I spent like almost half of my life in my school. To be one of a pack of some 50 gut-filled wolverines, and to survive in it for about 13 years, without nothing actually happening required balls, and much more. Being girl-less for a bigger part of my life may have changed my approach to a real crude one, but then it was freedom in one sense. You could release everything anywhere and everywhere. It was something every dude enjoyed at my school. It’s just real simple to understand. If you are chained for so long, you definitely won’t become accustomed to it. That’s the truth. You will always try to break free. And when you break free at the end of it, all that frustration, which caused it to happen, release in a split second, dynamically magnifying itself to a mammoth scale. And that is Bad. Real Bad. Somehow fate approached me in a totally different way…it put me in a school where I was granted total Anarchy, and so, at the end of it all, we(including the chaps in my class) had nothing to “release” and all, and we eventually grew up to respect freedom than to use it. But then when one reaches College, most people have a feeling that it is a gate to freedom, which is obviously bull-shit when I see it. The concept of freedom is so reduced that at times I feel like kicking myself down a cliff.

Let’s take Stan. He was a real good friend of mine. To begin with…he was one of the greatest geniuses (which includes the 50 super-human-samurais I introduced earlier) in the field of “whatever shit people discuss in first year college and just before and giggle and frown and smug and experiment and securitize and all.” The only things the geniuses missed were an approach to the other side of the horizon… to other spectrum of their own species on the planet. To be brief, these guys were (and still are) hard to crack, and they momentarily give you crowbars at their will, mainly for the common good of mankind. So after a lot of crowbar throwing, hitting, hammering, filing, and so on, these guys grew up to take all the shit of life, well…almost all the shit of life.

But then Stan, after all those lessons they threw at them, grew up to trust them. He was like them in all other aspects, but then it was the other sex that made it go all wrong. Enter Rita. Smart, intelligent, diligent, assiduous, sedulous, beautiful, and who seems to be a lil mature at times. I am not saying if she was tall or if she dances or if she has a temper the size of Eiffel tower or if she ever was at least a runner-up (or something) in some personality contest in her school, or if she used to chat through the net mostly on Saturdays, or if she always had that sparkle in her eye that made everyone feel like zombies in front of her. Okay… enough praise for some character who acquire shades of grey (and red) in the course of whatever I am typing down.

They say you should never ever spend a single paisa on a girl. The greatest loss for any guy is to invest on women. (I am not starting off an account…That would be rather, you know, err… yeah that.) So, trust me on that one, I have personally seen Stan go bankrupt with his savings. He’ll like save for months and months, and then spend on some stupid thing like cards or something. He doesn’t know how to show that he cares, but he tries, and so he tried. He used whatever talent he had; he used his aesthetic sense to hunt down stuff (mostly cards), or chocolates in some cases. But a rare feather-white handicraft card was one of the biggest blunders he committed. Stan always use to ask me “Isn’t that enough to show that I care?” What the fuck was he thinking? Girls don’t use their brain, that’s what you think? Guys think they are heart creatures. Big Mistake. They analyze every shit that comes their way, and they avoid everything thrown at them in a rather smart, if not appreciable way.

Guys, and girls, Martians and Venusians, the two at times almost make you feel like they are from different planets. Guys always tend to mistake friendship as love, and Girls, well, tend to take love as friendship. Sad no? Well…why the fuck am I blabbing shit like that? What love? All I wanted to say is about Intimacy. Isn’t there a concept called ‘intimate friendship’? Or did that die too in this age of shit-headiness? I have always wondered…an intimate friendship is pure and white…it’ll have challenges, but then when one approaches from a side, if the other person closes the system down, then there goes the ‘Chattiyum Kalavum’. Well, you may ask if intimate friends can be between girls and girls and guys and guys, but you see, Athallallo athinteyoru ithu? Yeythu? Yeah intimacy is a sort of love…the guy and the girl will eventually love each other. Don’t stress on the fucking word. It has a lot of meanings, and it varies from perspective to perspective. They will be more comfy with each other, they’ll love talking to each other, but then everything needs a start no? What if the guy and girl is some 200 km away from each other, there is always the marvel of communication technology to save the day, The mobile Phone!

One must understand the basics. No one wants to rape or bone or ‘marry’ the other. Even if that fantasy ever occurs, it’ll be discarded, which is guaranteed. Then why do they fear, and close down? Why? To find excuses or reasons for everything is easy, but is that enough for someone to cut down every little contact, and erase all the history they had as friends. I don’t know. I have much more to learn, and will be learning it shortly, but for the meantime, I think this shit is far more than enough. So I end it here. Let the almighty have mercy on the souls who wish to kill me after chewing on this yet another “mattey” post.


DISCLAIMER:I Seriously don’t give a fuck of what you think. I write and I write what I want to write. No shit is Real and Nothing mentioned above has anything to do with anything or anyone living or dead. If, by some permutations and combinations, such a thing occurs, It’s your problem in the first place to apply mathematics to english. The author is not responsible for any shit.